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Today we talk about the need for recognition, a complex issue that affects different aspects of our lives. The need for recognition comes in many forms: it can be economic, emotional or other recognition. This need is deeply related to the desire to be loved and accepted. What happens is that we are often conditioned by feelings of inadequacy, devaluation or injustice, which prevent us from fully enjoying the recognition we receive and make us fear disappointment.
I have had the opportunity to talk to people who are accomplished at work but nevertheless harbor a sense of inadequacy or devaluation. This shows how widespread the issue of merit and injustice is in our society.
We long for recognition, but are often afraid to receive it or ashamed to have received it. We find ourselves in a limbo between the desire to be recognized and the fear of disappointing others’ expectations or losing it.
The key to overcoming this vicious cycle is to recognize the feelings that inhabit us and understand what emotional wounds feed them. It is important to free ourselves from these feelings of inadequacy, devaluation and injustice so that we can live fully without the constant fear of disappointing others or losing our value.
Living according to one’s nature means accepting and respecting oneself for who you really are, without seeking constant recognition from others. It is a liberating process that allows us to contribute our uniqueness and authenticity to the world.
A useful exercise is to become aware of the labels we have self-imposed or that have been ascribed to us, and then reconsider them without judgment to see which characteristics truly reflect our nature.
If I decide to work on the wound, I stop feeding the ego and move from a state of dependence to a state of unconditional love toward myself.
Take a nature walk and observe:
nothing in nature asks to be other than what it is!
And if we are able to live on this earth, it is only because nature works: it provides us with oxygen, it gives us water, it feeds us constantly. It is undeniable and unquestionable that this is a system that works.
Pine makes pine, oak makes oak, carrot makes carrot. By maintaining and respecting our own nature, exchanging with the outside world, we contribute to our survival and the nurturing of a higher self.
In the end, we all aspire to be who we are, and instead we adapt to an idea of us that we think will be accepted by others. This is nonsense. It is time to take off our masks.
The more I respect myself, the more I know and accept my nature, the more I respect it. The less I will need people to recognize me, to value me with masks. It is time to stop creating and nurturing dependent relationships that can at best give me crumbs of conditional love. We are here for much more.
To all bearers of feelings of inadequacy, of not being enough, of not deserving, of devaluation: it’s time to work through it, unhook these sabotaging dynamics and bring your wonder into the world, with authenticity and uniqueness.